Music Waste… June 1-4

Music Waste
2006
in Vancouver, June 1st to 4th, 2006
Reviewed by Stephen Jersak

This year’s Music Waste featured over eighty bands playing in seven venues over four days. Unfortunately, the Ukrainian Hall was the only all-ages venue participating in the venue, and Kyle and Khol were the only ones putting on shows there, so I only got to see two shows (about 8% of the festival). Hopefully next year there’ll be more all ages shows, but if they don’t, can anyone make me a fake ID?

They Shoot Horses, Don’t They?
with the Doers, Summerlad, Love and Mathematics, and Cran
at Ukrainian Hall, June 2, 2006
Reviewed by Stephen Jersak

“Sing along when you know the words. Not if you know the words, when” – Jonny Hughes

Cran started shaky, with Spring-Break Faith falling on the half-empty hall less than perfectly. As the crowd fleshed out, and after a brief talk on feigning anxiety, Jonny was propelled past whatever was holding him back, and his set was on track. He finished strong as he continuously recruited members of the audience to fill up the stage.

Love and Mathematics sound quite a bit (at least to me) like some of the stuff I’ve started liking recently (Novillero and Fury and the Mouse hurdle into mind), but they weren’t as good/enjoyable. I liked the megaphone.

With a recital of the happenings of their day driving (including hitting and killing a mountain goat, which in some places is a crime punishable by fines of several thousand dollars), the Summerlad hit the stage. Atmosphere driven songs were flung from their perch on the pedestal of mediocrity when the vocals came in the on the second song. I felt an uncontrollable urge, equatable the experience of a school calendar near a refrigerator. I rushed to, and out, the door. I walked back in a few times under the impression that what I was hearing was decent, but the vocals would start again and the repulsion they generated would chase me to the exit. I can only dream that I never see these middle-aged bar-rockers ever again.

“The Doers live are as bad as They Shoot Horses” – name withheld.
I almost agree with the above statement. I think that the Doers live are worse than They Shoot Horses, but that’s because They Shoot Horses are amazing. That night The Doers played a good set. Not great, but thoroughly enjoyable as ever. MuchMusic videotaped their set, but reportedly, those tapes will never see the light of day; Sean Maxey shot down that possibility, saying to the cameraman that he was “not cool with it.”

They Shoot Horses, Don’t They? played one of the best sets I have ever seen. If I could change one thing about it, it would have been that there were more people in the room; I can’t think of what would make the band better. The songs kept of coming, they were the fullest I’ve ever them, and audience participation was stratospheric. At times, the crowd’s chanting drowned out the band, and a wall of claps, stomps, and crashing gardening equipment (as well as two-by-fours, umbrellas, and plethora of other materials) continued throughout the entire set. Two songs were recorded by MuchMusic, no word on when or if they’ll be shown.

The Winks
with the Safety Show, Fake Shark Real Zombie, 12 Year Old Girl, and STICKS
at Ukrainian Hall, June 3, 2006
Reviewed by Stephen Jersak

STICKS remind me of when I started going to shows, possibly because two-thirds of them make up a slightly smaller fraction of The Hand, whom I saw an excessive amount of times. The trio get me really excited, and I wish more people had shown up for their set, as well as the rest of the show. My other grievance is their set. Its length if you wan to get specific. Varge and STICKS are the only bands that I have ever thought worse of because their sets were so short (but it wasn’t much less.) Get more songs!

12 Year Old Girl. I couldn’t stand these three at first, but the more I listened the more I liked. They aren’t very good, the mountain of distortion on the bass was abominable, and the drum kit was falling apart, but I couldn’t hate this self-described “screamy metal band.” One song sounded uncannily like The Eagles’ Teenage Jail. I stole a quick look at their set list and nothing that could be interpreted as Teenage Jail was on the list (no teenage, no jail, no eagles, no other variants), so I assume it was an actual rip-off/accident.

Fake Shark Real Zombie
is amazing. I don’t particularly like their music, but their stage presence is incogitably preposterous, quite possibly the best I have seen. Ever. The drummer was ridiculous, literally running around the kit midway through a song, standing adjusting himself every couple seconds, while miraculously keeping the beat for the most part. The bassist jumping around may as well have been embalmed when compared to the energy of the rest of the band. I hated the vocals with a passion, and their cover songs were gross, but the rest sounded like sampling late 80’s Nintendo songs on fast forward through a thrash pedal. As awesome as I think that description sounds, they weren’t that awesome, but they were super entertaining.

Since Cadeaux broke up I have been actually enjoying their music. Unfortunately, the Safety Show reminded me of a less interesting version of the way I used to see Cadeaux. Boring.

The Winks are total rock stars. They set up behind the curtains, and their manager came out to introduce them. As the curtains pulled away, I was impressed by their musicianship. Everything sounded great, and I loved the cello, but they seemed to be talking down to us. I glanced over at the set list and groaned. Fifteen songs and not a couch in sight. I caught another couple songs and tried to leave but the manager physically blocked the door and told me to go back to the front. He gave up after about 30 seconds, but I left bitter.